Be Your Own Best Friend

Learn to use the core practices of compassion so that it is possible to love others without losing Yourself

How do you reach out to a friend in trouble, who may have had a misfortune or is going through difficult times?

Most of us naturally feel compassion when a close friend is struggling and respond by offering support, a hug, a kind act, and kind words.

What would it be like to receive the same caring attention from yourself whenever you needed it most or when you are experiencing difficulty?

All that’s required is a shift in attention —recognizing that you, too, are a worthy recipient of love, kindness and compassion. Self-compassion involves the capacity to comfort and soothe ourselves, and to motivate ourselves with encouragement, when we feel stressed, fail, or feel inadequate.

Kindness has the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. Kindness also helps us have a sense of being warm, soothed and nourished giving us a way to express care and respond to whatever challenges come along (meeting your own struggles too and coming back to being your own friend).

Mindful Self-Compassion is a combination of mindfulness, loving kindness, and compassion which can be compared to a three -legged stool with each leg supporting each other! This can be explained as follows:

Mindfulness is the first leg and involves becoming aware of, turning towards and acknowledge your own experiences of thoughts emotions and sensations with a spirit of openness and curiosity.

Loving Kindness, or the second leg, is a way of training the mind to be more loving and caring.

Self-Compassion, the third leg, is about responding to these challenges with kindness, and understanding so that we soothe and comfort ourselves when things are hurting.

Self -Compassion is an inner strength that enables us to be more fully human – to acknowledge our shortcomings, learn from them, and make necessary changes with an attitude of kindness and self-respect.

Research shows that self-compassion is strongly associated with emotional resourcing, resilience, well-being, lower levels of anxiety and depression, healthy lifestyle habits such as diet and exercise, and more satisfying personal relationships. Being both mindful and compassionate leads to greater ease and well-being in our daily lives.

The good news is Self-Compassion can be learned by anyone as it is innate to all human beings and is more a ‘remembering’ of our capacity to repeatedly evoke goodwill towards ourselves especially when life is difficult and stressful, while cultivating the desire that all living beings be happy and free from suffering, including ourselves!

MSC is open to anyone- all are welcome and it is not a requirement to have an established mindfulness practice to participate on an MSC course.

Who Would Benefit?

Anyone Feeling stressed and Overwhelmed:
Stresses of life that challenge everyone such as chronic pain, loss, illness, aging, challenges of work-life, relationships, or parenting?
What would it be like to respond to the stress caused by these challenges with love and kindness?
What would it be like to love others without losing yourself in the process?
Do you ever feel exhausted by caring for others?
What would it be like to meet your own emotional needs by giving yourself compassion, instead of becoming depleted and less able to give?

Care Givers:
Do you ever feel drained and overwhelmed when caring for others?
What would it be like to develop a sense of tenderness and care that embraces the suffering of others rather than emotionally reacting to it?
What would it be like to meet your own emotional needs by giving yourself compassion, instead of becoming depleted and less able to give?
Learn to use the core practices of compassion in the midst of caregiving so that it is possible to love others without losing ourselves

Mental Health Professionals:
Do you ever feel exhausted by your clinical work with clients?
What would it be like to give yourself compassion when experiencing empathic pain, as well as giving compassion to those you work with?
What would it be like to deepen the therapeutic relationship by developing self- compassion for yourself and which benefits the client?
Learn to empathetically resonate with people who are suffering( which can be draining and even overwhelming, leading to caregiver fatigue and burnout), without losing yourself

Mindfulness Teachers:
Do you ever feel stressed or overwhelmed when teaching others?
Learn to respond to the challenges of teaching with compassion rather than self-criticism
Learn to develop a sense of tenderness and care that holds the suffering of others rather than emotionally reacting to it?
Deepen a sense of presence and awareness, through self-compassion practices.

What is possible to practice and learn over the 8 week Mindful Self-Compassion Course?

In MSC you learn to:

• Practice mindfulness and self-compassion in daily life
• Understand the science of self-compassion
• Handle difficult emotions with greater ease
• Motivate yourself with kindness rather than criticism
• Transform challenging relationships, old and new
• Manage caregiver fatigue
• Practice the art of savouring and self-appreciation
• Teach simple self-compassion skills to others

What to Expect

• Each weekly session includes meditation, short talks, experiential exercises, group discussion, some movement, and home practices.  The goal is for participants to directly experience self-compassion and learn practices that evoke self-compassion in daily life.
• MSC includes 8 weekly sessions of 3 hours each
• A  Retreat Day usually after week 5/6 on Saturday or Sunday .
• Prior to registering, participants should plan to attend every session and practice mindfulness and self-compassion at least 30 minutes per day throughout the program.
• MSC is primarily a compassion training program rather than mindfulness training like Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), although mindfulness is the foundation of self-compassion. MSC is also not psychotherapy insofar as the emphasis of MSC is on building emotional resources rather than addressing old wounds. Positive change occurs naturally as we develop the capacity to be with ourselves in a kinder, more compassionate way.
• It is said that “love reveals everything unlike itself.” While some difficult emotions may arise when practicing self-compassion, MSC teachers are committed to providing a safe, supportive environment for this process to unfold, and to making the journey interesting and enjoyable for everyone.

Prerequisites

No previous experience with mindfulness or meditation is required to attend MSC. Participants are asked to provide background information and fill out an application form. The facilitator(s) will talk through the application form with each applicant and each other prior to being accepted onto the programme.

Recommended reading for participants: one or both of the following books before or during the program:

Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion by Christopher Germer
The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook by Kristin Neff and Chris Germer